Wednesday, June 25, 2014

WTF Wednesday: Viral Hoaxes Suck

Inklingers, I'm tired; tired of having my heartstrings ferociously tugged on, then released into the wind with the word hoax. Then anger sets in, and doubt, and then people wonder why I'm such a jaded person who doesn't believe anything I read on the internet at all.
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A week or so ago, a news story erupted about how a 3 year old child who had been viciously attacked by a dog was asked to leave a KFC because her face was "disrupting [the] customers." I read the reports, my heart felt for this child, but something in the back of my skeptic mind started screaming.

In this day and age, with social media as it is, how quickly things go viral, and how quickly people sue after things go viral, how would an employee anywhere be dumb enough to ask a person with a physical disfigurement to leave a public place? That's a lawsuit, and worldwide embarrassment, waiting to happen.

But the child? The child, my heart bled for. The pictures were obviously not photoshopped, and no matter what happened or didn't happen, that child had a lifetime of surgeries and rehabilitation ahead of her.

Then the unspeakable happened- a few days ago, it was released that the KFC incident was a hoax, brewed up by the family to gain money from sympathizers and KFC. The family swears it isn't a hoax, but as there is no video surveillance of them entering any KFC in that area, nor is there any record of their purchase, it seems like the family pulled one over on the entire world.

KFC still agreed to donate $30,000 to the girl's surgery fund. Way to go, KFC.

Now I'm pissed... and tired. The whole KFC hoax does not change the fact that this child was disfigured in a

Sunday, June 22, 2014

You Might Be a Southern Mom If...

1. You ever shouted, "Stop your wallerin' out there and get inside before you get your clothes dirty; we're gettin' ready to go out!" For those who don't speak Southern, wallerin' is the same as wallowing and describes when animals roll around in the mud to keep cool. We Southern Moms also use it to describe what our kids are doing out in the yard when they play.

2. You ever had to explain US history past the Civil War to your kids because the school systems didn't seem to cover that. Seriously. Learning history in the South stops with the Civil War. When I was in 10th grade, we watched "Forrest Gump" to cover what happened in US history after the Civil War, because we had 2 weeks of school left in order to learn the last 130 years.

3. Slapping some breading on a vegetable and frying it is an acceptable way to get kids to eat their veggies. We Southerners make fried green beans, fried asparagus, fried squash, fried zucchini and even fried pickles- those'll make your mouth water!!

4. You tell a kid to go outside and find a switch, and all of the color rushes from their face in dread. A switch is a branch off a tree used on your backside if you've been bad. When you are a kid, you think it's smart to stay away from the big ones, because they'll hurt more, right? WRONG! Those skinny

Wednesday, June 18, 2014

WTF Wednesday: Sweeping and Mopping Isn't Cleaning the House??

I'm one of those people who has to have a cleaning schedule. Why? So I make sure it gets done. I straighten my house each day, but as far as deeper cleaning is concerned, I need to know that Mondays I mop, Wednesdays I do the bathrooms, and so forth. My memory sucks sometimes, too.

But, according to Hubby, what I do each day doesn't constitute "cleaning the house."

Oh yes, I will definitely explain.

Here's a rough outline of my weekly cleaning schedule:

Monday- Straighten entire house (pick up big things, clear off counters/tables/flat spaces), sweep, vacuum and mop the floors.

Tuesday- Dust (though this usually gets done every other Tuesday).

Wednesday- Bathrooms

Thursday- Deeper cleaning of kitchen counters, bedroom, vacuum stairs (again, usually every other week on that one).

Friday- Touch up for the weekend.

Each day I do a general straightening, just so things don't pile up. On the weekends I relax, and as a result, come Monday morning again, our house looks like a hurricane hit

Monday, June 16, 2014

Tatted Mom's Log: Camping Trip #1

Captain's Log Tatted Mom's Log: Camping Trip #1, Day 1

1 pm
We have arrived at our destination after a grueling, winding, vomit-worthy drive up the mountain. 27 miles took an hour. The temperature dropped nearly 20 degrees. We are truly in uncharted territory for our family, and I definitely haven't seen this much green around me since we moved to Arizona.

We paid our camping fee and got to drive around until we found a site that suited us. We have chosen a pretty remote spot, as we only have an older couple to our left, down the road a bit and across the street, and to our right an older gentleman with a dog up on a hill.

8:30 pm
Shelter has been secured, hammock hung, Toilets of Death explored (as my children have dubbed them- they are, in fact, vault toilets with a huge vile hole beneath), dinner of Cowboy Casserole eaten (baked beans with sausage over biscuits), and now we are ready for bed, yes, at 8:30 at night. We are sure nature will wake us with the sun, so for tonight, we are turning in early.

9:30 pm
What on earth is that sound? It's so loud and horrible that it woke up Hubby and I. I've heard it somewhere before... somewhere... from the depths of my nightmares...

Yes... from my childhood. My brain is filtering through memories now as my fear grows...

There it goes again.

Flashes of memory.

Yes. That movie with the house... and the kid who lives in the walls... with no tongue... who laughs that horrible laugh as he scampers through the walls, evading the owners. His laugh... so horrible... so creepy...

So... coming from the neighbors to our left?? What?

That sound could not possibly be made by humans. And yet, there it goes again. Evil laughter.

So loud. So frightening. So... annoying.

Okay, time to shut up now. Whatever it is can not be that damn funny. Seriously, people are trying to sleep over here.

11 pm
Laughing from the camp down the road has continued for over an hour. Hubby and I have now dubbed them "The People Under the Stairs." Seriously, this night could not get worse.

11:30 pm
I stand corrected. Who in the hell shows up to a camp site at 11 o'clock at night, speeding down the road

Friday, June 6, 2014

Ending a Mom Friendship Because of Their Kids: Taboo or Understandable?

Mom Friendships.

We moms need them just as much as our kids need social interaction with other children. We need friends to talk to, to share advice with, to bond with, and to make motherhood just a little easier.

So, what happens when someone you become Mom Friends with has nightmare children?

Do you speak up? Do you keep your mouth shut in the name of having a Mom Friend? Is it wrong if you want to end the friendship; does that make you a bad person?

The subject of Mom Friendships has come up quite a bit for me lately, and with each conversation I'm a part of, the same problem is posed, and the same question follows:

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"I like her, but her kids are absolutely horrible. I just don't know if I can handle being around them anymore, but I can't end a friendship with someone because of their kids, can I? That's really wrong of me, isn't it?"

Because of what I learned from my past, I now answer this with, "Why is that wrong of you?"

I was once in a Mom Friendship that I wasn't sure about. The Mom herself was great; we had a lot in common as individuals, shared the same interests, and laughed (a lot) when we were together.

But her toddler was a whole different story.

This child was spoiled (to say the least). She dictated which restaurants the family ate at, where they shopped at, and even which car they drove when they went out, and the parents just gave in to the child to prevent a temper tantrum. It was their story that the child's temper tantrums were so violent that she threw up during them, due to her acid reflux, so it was just easier for them to give in to whatever the child wanted, because if they said no, they'd have a huge mess to clean up.

I shook my head at this when I was first explained it all, but I gave them the benefit of the doubt... until I saw it in person one day...

Wednesday, June 4, 2014

WTF Wednesday: Damn You, School-Like Pizza!!

Starting this blog post today is difficult, because I'm not exactly sure how far to go back, or whether to start with the nostalgia or the present day info. So, I'll do what I'd do in conversation: Throw out random words and promise I'll connect them by the end of the post.

School Pizza
Weight Watchers

There you go. Now we can begin, because y'all trust that I will connect the dots (la la la la la...).

I've been on Weight Watchers for about 2 and a half months now. I started out really well, lost 12 pounds in the first 2 months or so, and then took a few weeks off from point-counting to enjoy wine, cookouts and nights out with a friend who moved back to the east coast.

Let me pause for a second (in case some Weight Watchers' rep finds my blog and want to try and take me down): you can totally enjoy wine, cookouts and nights out with a friend when you are on WW. I had just already met my goal weight that they set for me, so I decided to see what I could do without tracking food each day before I set a new goal weight for myself. The result? I gained 2 pounds back and maintained that weight just fine.
YES!! This stuff!!
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So with all of the chaos of my friend leaving behind us, I decided to get back on track with WW to try and meet the new goal I had set for myself (and lose those extra pounds I had gained).

Now I'm going to jump back and take you on a trip down memory lane...

Y'all remember school pizza, right? I'm talking about that rectangle mass of cheese and mystery meat that was available pretty much every day in high school, but only on certain days (usually Friday) in middle school.

That stuff was AMAZING!!!

And, that stuff is not available anywhere to the general public. Trust me, I've looked. A few years ago,