I'll set the scene for you. Yesterday morning, Hubby got off work and headed upstairs to change out of his uniform. I joined him, in our bedroom, so we could figure out our plans for the day. The Ginger was downstairs playing video games, and The Girl had a friend over who stayed the night, and they were both downstairs, too. Keep in mind, this all happened within about 5 minutes.
(Hubby lays on top of the bed in just his boxers and puts the laptop on his lap to research something, and I sat down next to him.)
Me: Don't you think you should put some pants on? The Girl has a friend downstairs.
Hubby: Yeah, but we're in our bedroom, upstairs.
Me: And? You know our kids.
Hubby: Well, shut the door, then.
Me: (Getting up to shut the door) Okay, but you still need to put some pants on.
Hubby: I just got done with a 9 hour shift on the flightline. My balls are hot. I'll put pants on in second.
Me: Fine. So, we need to go shopping for some more summer clothes for the kids, but I need to make a budget. Does The Ginger need shorts?
Hubby: (yelling) GINGER!!!
Me: Good grief. I figured you just knew since you took him clothes shopping last.
Hubby: Yeah, I don't remember.
The Ginger: (opening the door) Yeah?
Me: Do you need shorts?
The Ginger: I don't know.
Me: (staring at him) Well, go look, please. Count the number of shorts you have and let me know.
Hubby: Count the clean and the dirty ones, too.
(The Ginger disappears, leaving the door wide open. The Girl pokes her head in.)
The Girl: Did you call me?
Me: No, your dad called your brother, but while you are here, how many pairs of shorts do you need?
The Girl: I don't know. My blue ones have a hole in them.
Me: I know that. You wanted me to sew them, and I don't sew. Remember?
The Girl: Oh yeah...
(The Ginger enters the room holding one pair of shorts and a shirt.)
The Ginger: I'll wear this today (holding outfit up).
Hubby: Okay. So how many shorts do you have?
The Ginger: I don't know.
Me: You were supposed to count them and come back here and let us know.
The Ginger: OHHHH.... (leaves room)
(We look up to see The Girl's friend has poked her head into the room, too.)
Me: (to The Girl) Would 2 pairs be fine?
(Hubby and I realize at the exact same time that he's still in boxers with a laptop on his lap.)
The Girl: Yeah, that's good.
Me: (rushing The Girl and her friend out of the room while Hubby tries to figure out how to cover up more) Okay, 2 pairs, fine.
(Awkward silence while Hubby gets up and puts shorts on.)
Me: I told you to put some pants on.
Hubby: Well, I'm sorry. I thought we'd be okay in our bedroom.
Me: (starting to giggle) In our house? With our kids? (The giggle turns into a laugh.)
Hubby: (starting to chuckle) Well, the door was closed, too. I thought The Ginger would close it behind him...
(I burst out laughing.)
Me: (laughing my ass off) The Ginger... (more laughing) shut... (more laughing)... the door???? (I'm crying from laughing so hard at this point.) Seriously? You thought he would?
Hubby: (full on laughing now) Yeah, I guess I didn't think that one through.
(In walks The Ginger, holding 3 pairs of shorts and 2 shirts.)
The Ginger: (throwing the clothes on our bed) Here. (starts to walk out of the room)
Me: Whoa whoa whoa. What is this?
The Ginger: My clean shorts and shirts.
Me: We just wanted you to count them, honey.
Hubby: The dirty ones, too, remember?
The Ginger: (frustrated) WHAT? Why would I need to count my clothes? I thought you wanted to see what clean clothes I had.
Me: We're going shopping today. We need to know how many shorts and shirts you have so we know how many to buy you. So, go count everything, please.
The Ginger: I'm fine. I don't need any new clothes.
Me: You just don't want to count them, do you?
The Ginger: Nope.
Hubby: Well, do it anyway. Just count them...
Me: And come back here with a number, please.
The Ginger: Fine.
(The Ginger exits the room, leaving the door wide open once again, and Hubby and I just look at each other.)
Me: Some days we need a reality show.
Hubby: Yep. I agree.