Friday, June 28, 2013

Dear Coffee Gods...

Dear Coffee Gods,

I apologize. I apologize, from the bottom of my heart, for whatever I did to anger you all. If it's because I haven't been to Starbucks in ages, I'll go today, I promise. If it's because I quit drinking a cup of decaf at night because I ran out of decaf, I will buy some today, I promise. Just let me know why you have frowned upon me, and I will fix it.

About 2 weeks ago, my Keurig died (may it rest in peace). Only a member of our family for not even 2 years, I did everything I could to save it, including taking it apart and putting it back together, googling answers, and cleaning it out. My last hope was Keurig customer service, and Lindsay informed me that it was, indeed, time to grieve and move on. My Keurig will be missed.

Thankfully, we had my red coffee maker ready to commence its job as Head Coffee Maker. She was programmable, so Hubby and I would set her at night, and we'd have a fresh pot of coffee ready for when we woke up. Great system we had going.

Until this morning, when Hubby noticed the green light was on, but no coffee had brewed. This time, panic
struck. I frantically started pushing buttons, checking water levels, unplugging and plugging it back in... and nothing. I cleaned the coffee maker out... and nothing. After only being in my life for 2 1/2 years, my red coffee maker is dead, too.

2 coffee makers, 2 weeks, both dead. We had a back up: Hubby's rinky dinky $10 coffee maker that he had in his apartment before the kids and I got here last year. The key word here is had. With a Keurig and my red coffee pot, we sold his crappy one at a yard sale last year. If only I had known...

So, Coffee Gods, I ask you now, Why? Why have you forsaken me? Let me know what I need to do to fix this, because I do not want my house to be known as The Place Where Coffee Makers Go To Die. We take care of our coffee makers, and we use them on a very regular basis. So why? And how do I fix this? Tell me what I need to do, and I'll do it.

For this morning, I'm okay. Because of my mad couponing skills, a few months ago I got some packs of instant coffee for free. I had no idea, at the time, why I was getting instant coffee. Now I know. But, Coffee Gods, you remember the last time we had instant coffee, right? Remember that guy I dated years ago that didn't have a coffee maker... that guy... Please, for the love of all that is right in this world, don't make me that girl again... I beg you. I don't mind instant coffee, but the memories, Coffee Gods, the memories. Let's just agree now that this will be the only cup of instant coffee, and that it was an absolute necessity.

Tonight, Hubby and I will be heading to Target to buy another coffee maker. I ask you, Coffee Gods, to bless the new member of our family, to a long life of many years... not just 2 years.

And if I have done something to anger you, I sincerely apologize. If you let me know what it is, I can fix it. I can't continue to have coffee makers die in my house, especially not at 6 in the morning when Hubby is heading to work. There's only so much free instant coffee...

With Deepest Apologies and a Heavy Heart From Our 2 Losses in 2 Weeks,

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1 comment:

  1. They died so you could write this post and start MY day out right! Thank you!