Friday, September 14, 2012

Lazy Mom

Every now and then I look back at past posts to get a feel of any trends of subject matter or post type that I do. Between the My Biggest Parenting Pet Peeve post,  Get Involved or Mind Your Business, and the more recent Potty Training In Public? Utah Mom Thinks it's Okay, I'm definitely seeing a social trend...

Lazy parenting.

Is this something that's always been around, I just never really noticed it until I became a mom myself? Is it on the rise in recent years more so than in the past? Or is it just that thanks to social media and being able to pass information quickly to one another and to the masses, that stupid and lazy parenting acts are being spread around faster and to more people as soon as they happen?

When I start to put together puzzles like this, I always end up looking at myself in regards to the subject. Am I a lazy parent? Can I write a post about lazy parenting and not be considered a hypocrite for doing so? Am I one step away from having an interaction with my kids displayed all over youtube or facebook? Fingers crossed I'm not, but if I were to be completely honest with myself, then yeah...

I'm often a lazy mom.

I don't base my comparison on other moms around me or moms we see making stupid mistakes (like the subject matters of the 3 posts above). Instead, I base my comparison on my own childhood.

As a child, my parents always tucked me into bed at night. If I ended up falling asleep on the couch or floor while watching a movie, they woke me up, helped me into my room, pulled the covers up and over me, and tucked me in. Kiss to the forehead, a 'Good night, sweet dreams' and they were done.

Many nights in my house, I don't even realize my kids have voluntarily gone to bed. We'll be watching a movie and when it's done, I'll look around to find that Hubby and I are the only ones awake, The Ginger is asleep in the chair, and The Girl is gone. She has this habit of not saying a word, just getting up, going to her room, laying down and passing out. I've asked her time and time again to at least say, 'Good night, I'm going to bed,' but she doesn't do it. Other nights Hubby and I tell the kids to climb into bed and we'll be there in a second to tuck them in, and, well... we forget. We get so caught up in the quietness of the house that we ask a few minutes later, 'Where are the kids?' By the time we get back to their rooms, they are passed out.

I have a second point of comparison for you. As a child, I remember the Tooth Fairy coming on time, when I
lost a tooth, and consistently throughout my childhood. As seen in Our Tooth Fairy is Flaky, apparently the next generation of Tooth Fairies are lazy, too. Our Tooth Fairy often forgets altogether to put money under my kids' pillows. Sometimes she's days late, sometimes the money is scattered under the bed, which I happen to find after one of the kids has already been looking for 5 minutes. Being the Tooth Fairy for your kids is not a hard concept, but many times my lazy parenting has my kids thinking the Tooth Fairy is scatterbrained.

The next pit stop on this lazy parenting train is cooking. Growing up, both of my parents worked or went to school. My dad was a full time firefighter, and my mom took her education into her own hands as an adult and went back to get her degree (I remember going to class with her and sitting in the floor drawing pictures during her psychology classes) then worked full time as well. It never failed, though. She would get home from working a full day and make a dinner of fried pork chops, mashed potatoes and green beans. We hardly ever ate fast food (I didn't have my first McDonald's Happy Meal until I was 5 or 6), except for either Friday or Saturday night, we'd have pizza. As a mom now, I cook. I'm also a stay at home mom, meaning I don't have a full time job to go to each day (outside the home), and there are many days that I beg Hubby to cook when he gets home from his full time job, because I just don't feel like it. I never win that begging act, but at least I try. We eat fast food maybe once a week (it's usually more like once every 2 weeks), and my kids were introduced to a McDonald's Happy Meal at the age of 2 (though we haven't eaten that crap in almost a year now). Things are way different now than they were 20 and 30 years ago.

I'm not saying that overall I'm a lazy mom. My kids have clean clothes, are bathed, have food in their stomachs that I've more than likely cooked, have nutritious lunches that I pack myself, and we even do things together as a family like Family Game Night and art time after school. I always have, and probably always will have this unrelenting (and often unreasonable) need to be Super Mom, and when Lazy Mom sneaks in and takes over, I often welcome her. Extremes are not good. Just as the 3 examples above are the extreme of lazy parenting, being the opposite extreme of Super Mom is just as harmful. We moms need to let Lazy Mom take over every once in a while so we don't get burned out. Burned out moms are the worst. And I think if, overall, what you are doing for your family and yourself outweighs what you aren't doing for your family and yourself, then you are fine.

So if you are a mom who has a forgetful Tooth Fairy, or wonders where your kids are at night just to remember you told them to go to bed, you aren't alone. As long as you aren't letting your toddler run around outside unsupervised for 8 hours a day or potty training your kids at the table in a public restaurant, you are good to go.

Share below some of the ways your Lazy Mom takes over! And don't forget to hit that brown banner below to vote for me!

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  1. I so pull the "five more minutes" on my son all the time. Granted I'm half awake so he's not in danger but still. I feel so guilty, those are the mornings he gets a full cooked breakfast to compansate mommy being a lazy ass. Also I create "fun" meals that require little to no effort on my part. Like the english muffin pizzas we had last night. He thinks it's the coolest, but yeah, it was just me being lazy.

    1. LOL, just wait until you make your little one cook the english muffin pizza- he'll think it's the coolest thing ever and you get to be even more lazy. That's why we do 'Kids Cook Night' once a week at our house, lol.

  2. Hi Morgan, I'm Anne. I've seen your little snippet on TMB for a while now, but never got around to checking it out before. So glad I finally did!
    Just between you and me, I'm a lazy Mom, too, though I've trained my kids to think I am "training them to be independent people".
    Anyway, we're kind of like neighbors on TMB, so come over and say hi sometime. I'm at Life on the Funny Farm:

    1. Hi, Anne! I've checked out your blog a few times, just usually don't say anything, lol. Eeek, does that make me a stalker?? LOL, I hope not.... =P