Tuesday, July 31, 2012

13 Years and We Haven't Killed Each Other

13 years ago today, Hubby and I said 'I do'.

Wait, 13 years ago? I know what y'all are thinking. If you do the math, that would have made me like 12 years old when I got married. Thank you, y'all flatter me. I was *slightly* older than 12... it's a shock, I know (and by *slightly* I mean of legal age).

Holy crap, it's been 13 years. Doesn't feel like it. Maybe because we were separated for almost 4 years of that, or because we are just so well fit for each other that it feels natural and time passes without us even batting an eyelash...

Or maybe both of us are just too lazy to go about staging a murder to look like an accident or figuring out how to clean up a crime scene and bury a body without the cops figuring it out. Hell, we were too lazy to get an actual divorce, which worked out in the end, so I'm pretty sure we're too lazy to kill one another.

I've shared some of the banter between Hubby and I with you all before, because I do get asked a lot, especially now that we're back together, how things are with us. So, with today's post, I wanted to share with you all some randomness of Hubby and I. Some facts, some banter, all crazy, that has helped us survive 13 years and a separation.

~We were originally supposed to get married in October, but we decided to move the date to July so I could start college in the fall. When the fall came, we got offered a house on base, so we ended up moving instead of me starting college anyway. Oops.

~I'm the type of wife that would drive Hubby and his friends to a strip club, hand him dollar bills, hang out and not drink, and then drive their drunk asses back home at the end of the night.

~I'll set the stage for a recent conversation between us: Hubby was on the couch, away from the front window. I was at the window, which overlooks the pool outside.

Me: Good gracious, those are definitely fake.
Hubby: Black and yellow plaid bikini in the pool?
Me: (Paused for a second and looked around to see if he could see what I was talking about. He couldn't.) How in the hell do you know what I'm talking about?
Hubby: I saw her a few minutes ago when I was watering the plants outside.
Me: Wow, you failed that test miserably.
Hubby: I may have looked at her boobs, but yours are the only ones I want to get all up in between.
Me: You may have just saved yourself.

~We still wished each other a Happy Anniversary the 4 years we were separated.

~Hubby embraces my short attention span and how quickly I get addicted to different interests, and I
embrace his love of video games. Okay, okay, I'm sugar coating shit right there. These are things we hate about each other, but tolerate in the name of love.

~One of my favorite stories to tell about us: Keep in mind this was before we had kids, and yes, there was alcohol involved.

We had a wooden coffee table with 3 glass panes in it, and on the center glass pane was a large 3 wick candle. We had some friends over one night, and Hubby thought it would be funny to pick up the candle and toss it around.

Me: Hey, put the candle down before you drop it and break the coffee table.
Hubby: (Tossing the candle between his hands like it's a football and laughing.) Chill out, I'm not going to drop... (He dropped the candle, which crashed through the center glass pane and shattered it.) Silence....

~Hubby has this really annoying thing where, when I experiment for dinner and it turns out good, he figures out a way to make it better and cooks it himself the next go around. It makes me want to stab him with a butter knife (but remember, I'm too lazy to do so).

~I watch wrestling with him and he watches.... wait. He doesn't watch any of my TV shows with me. No 'Desperate Housewives', no 'Melissa and Joey', no 'Beverly Hills Nannies', no 'Ghost Adventures'. He'll be in the room when they are on, but won't actually pay attention to them. Hmmm....

~When we went through the before-ceremony marriage counseling that the church required in order to marry us, we learned 2 things that we've held true. I'll let you all know what the preacher told us, and how we've interpreted it for the last 13 years in parenthesis.

  1. Never say something behind your spouse's back that you wouldn't say to their face. (Say everything to their face; the good, the bad, the ugly. Be completely honest.)
  2. Never go to bed angry at each other. (Turn your backs to each other, roll half way over, shout, 'I love you', give a half assed kiss, and roll back over to go to sleep. We've found you can't always squelch every disagreement before bed, and sometimes you need time to cool off and clear your head before you tackle the subject again, including a good night's sleep.)

Hubby truly is my best friend, the love of my life, and my other half. Here's to the next 13 years...

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  1. Congratulations! I'm sure that it is wonderful to celebrate an anniversary together. And, for what it's worth, I frequently point out women's body parts to my husband. He always tries valiantly not to look, but I make him. I need him to know what I'm talking about after all.

    1. Thanks! And, normally I do, too. I just found this time a little 'off' lol.

  2. I read almost all of your posts but I'm too lazy too comment..sorry :) Plus, I'm usually trying to hide somewhere at work when I'm catching up on blogs! I LOVE this post! Congrats on 13 years! 13 years is a big deal. It seems like people change spouses nowadays as often as they change their underwear. No one ever said marriage was going to be easy...kudos to you both for still be able to call each other best friends! My husband and I are going on 12 years in Jan. I was 22 when we got married and most of the time he is my ONLY true friend. No one has my back more than him. Congrats again for not killing each other yet...that is a huge accomplishment :)

    1. Thanks! I think that's been the key- remaining best friends. And the too lazy to kill each other thing, lol. Congrats on almost 12 years yourself! =)