Monday, April 16, 2012

1 Fun Week = 3 Months of Being Grounded

Hubby has gone and done it again, only this time... a hell of a lot worse.

Last time he visited, I gained 10 pounds in 2 weeks, amongst other things that fall under what I called, "The Aftermath of Hurricane Hubby".

This time? I gained 7 pounds in 8 days. Can someone tell me how that's even f*cking possible??? Seriously.

I'm going to confess something real quick before I continue on with my post. I watch those shows... you know, the weight loss ones. Not the "normal" weight loss ones, but like the 600 lb man weight loss ones. My favorite is "Heavy" because the people get sent to a weight rehab center and work their asses off... literally. But one of the trainers in an episode of "Heavy" was barking at the people who signed up for the show, trying to get them motivated and said, 'It wasn't easy getting the weight on, so it's not going to be easy getting the weight off.'

Um, I beg to differ, there, personal trainer, sir. I just gained 7 pounds in 8 days, and that was easy as pie... and oreo dirt cake... and Golden Corral buffet... and sausage, egg and cheese biscuits for breakfast... yeah, pretty damn easy.

Even with the increased eating I did, I still don't understand how I gained that much weight in that amount of time. I'm actually a petite person, so for me to consume 3500 calories over what I burn in a day, in order to gain almost a pound a day, should be statistically impossible.

And yet, I accomplished it. What's even more sad, is one day, we spent the entire day touring various spots downtown, and I walked, and hiked up hills, for a total of 6 hours that day, burning over 2500 calories... and I still gained weight.

So, currently, I'm at the highest weight I've been at since I had my son 7 years ago and came down from my baby weight (depressing). I'm still not saying I'm 'fat', but what I am saying is that I'm not comfortable at the weight I'm currently at, and I only have 1 pair of pants that fits me. Either I need to lose the weight to fit back into my clothes, or I need to buy an entire new wardrobe... I'm going with option A, as much as it sucks.

What's my plan of attack? I'm grounding myself. Seriously. I'm removing the 'fun' of last week (oreo dirt cake... I keep mentioning that, but it was good. I added blackberries to the center of each cup as an attempt to make it healthier, despite the fact it had oreos and cool whip in it, but it was amazing... sorry for the tangent, the heavy girl inside me just got excited again... buttery popcorn, fast food breakfasts, Easter candy, sodas, etc) and becoming a responsible adult with healthy eating habits... suck ass grounding, if you ask me.

I'm also going to incorporate fresh fruit juice smoothies into my diet...

Now hold on a sec, because I can hear the thoughts in some of your heads. I'm not doing a 'fad diet' of just drinking juice smoothies. Fad diets don't work, and I know this. I've actually extensively studied nutrition and weight loss, and once came up with a diet plan that had me lose 25 lbs in 30 days and I never regained the weight back...well, until now that is, 7 years later... but that was when I was a stay at home mom and had money to buy fresh everything. I also counted every calorie that went into my body and exercised twice a day to get those results.

I'm too lazy for that now. Hey, at least I'm honest.

But today I did buy a mini blender, and have some great fresh fruit smoothie recipes that will help jump start my weight loss and my energy levels, while detoxing my system from the crazy unhealthy way I've eaten for the last week. I also bought athletic shoes (haven't owned a pair in years now), a kettle bell weight, and some herbal tea today, too. I plan to start taking walks with the kids in the evenings and using the kettle bell while I sit on my ass and watch tv. I enjoy multitasking.

I have a goal, down the road, of taking up running. But, seeing as I have it set in my mind that running is only necessary if the zombie apocalypse has begun, that one will take some working up to.

What's my overall goal? A 15 pound weight loss would make me happy; 20 pounds would make me overjoyed, but that's a tough one to achieve and honestly not necessary. And, the kicker? I want to achieve this before I see Hubby next, which is in about 2 1/2 - 3 months. Absolutely doable, in a healthy manner that will ensure the weight stays off, but it's not something I'll be able to do while sitting on my ass, that's for sure.

The really tough part is reprogramming myself around my daughter. I'm not fat, and I don't want her to think that I think I am, but I do want to lose the weight in a way that will not make her have image issues (there's an entire blog post on this to come). Society and media are hard enough on girls nowadays as it is, to not have to hear a mom who is within her healthy weight limit, saying that she's fat and needs to lose weight. So, I've been re-training myself to say, 'I want to eat healthier to gain more energy during the day' when I'm around her.

So, I guess wish me luck. Considering this isn't a weight loss blog, don't worry, I won't be updating every week the status of my goals or posting pictures on the blog. I may at the end of it all post a before and after pic, along with some details of what I did and what I didn't do... if I'm successful, that is... but that's about it.

I know I'll be dreaming of my oreo dirt cake and buttery popcorn, though. Damn, this week has been fun, that's for sure. I'll let you know if it's worth my grounding, though, after I'm a few days into this.

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  1. I don't even know what to say: what were you eating? LOL

  2. I recently listened to an audiobook where the author puts forth the idea that calories in/calories out has zero to do with our weight. It sounds revolutionary, but his research cites that actually, the calories in/out theory is relatively new, was radical when proposed, and has been proven false over and over again. He says it's not calories in/out, it's insulin. Anything that jacks our insulin up is what causes the problem.

    You're a smart cookie; you would likely really enjoy this book. I listened to it on a road trip, and it took about 5 hours. Why We Get Fat: And What to do About It After listening to it the first time, I stopped eating sugars and refined flours. And I dropped 7 pounds in 9 days. Then I had a cupcake. And some pasta. And tortilla chips. I'm back up a pound, but it's interesting to see what this means. I don't *need* cupcakes. At least not one per day, sheesh!

    1. Aaaahhhhhhhh! M, you know I loovvveeee books, AND it's my day off.... Heading to Barnes & Noble when the kids go to school now, lol. Thanks for the suggestion!

  3. Never actually heard the term "whore bath". Makes sense to me. Thanks for the education.