Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Text Talk = WTF?

Today I realized... I am old.

Well, I'm older than I want to admit.

I was waiting in line at the drug store, and beside me was the 'Texting Dictionary of Acronyms". I picked it up, started flipping through it, and that's when it hit me that I'm old.

I still spell out 'What are you doing' instead of using 'WAYD' when I text, 'I love you' instead of 'ILY', 'Not much, you?' instead of 'NMY'.

I should add in that I freaking hate texting acronyms. I'll throw in an 'LOL' if what the person says actually makes me laugh out loud, sometimes an 'IDK', but for the most part I spell out what I need to say- I did graduate high school, after all. But here in front of me was an entire book of acronyms for the lazy texter. A whole book.

Needless to say, I bought the book out of simple curiosity.

I couldn't believe some of the stuff in there. Clearly the author (or, compiler, actually, in my opinion), had visited some nerdy chat rooms, racy chat rooms, and followed teenagers around, reading their texts. Some of this stuff is crazy, I mean, do some people actually use these??

ILICISCOMK (I laughed, I cried, I spit coffee on my keyboard.)
JUADLAM (Jumping up and down like a monkey)
LDIMEDILLIGAC (Look deeply into my eyes, Does it look like I give a crap?)
EMRTW (Evil monkeys rule the world.)
NE14KFC (Anyone for KFC?)
SLOM (Sticking leeches on myself.)
IMHEIUO (In my high, exalted, informed, unassailable opinion)

And the list goes on. Seriously, who uses these things? And how much brain power does it take to make the 'look deep into my eyes' one above into an acronym. I'm all for new ways of being a smart ass, but just do what I do when I'm bored; send back a smilie that's dead. X-P  People will know they killed you with boredom or whatever stupid crap it was they told you.

That's when I started to wonder if an entire conversation, with somewhat substantial meaning, could be had via texting nothing but acronyms. My sister and I grabbed the texting dictionary and took the challenge:

Sis: IHU S^
Sis: Y IHA
Sis: UG2BK

It was like this, but texting...
And then a virtual fight broke out. There was mashing of the keys, lots of $%&*$@ being typed, even some hateful smilies. It was a mess. All's cool now. We decided to call a truce and never use texting acronyms again...

Guess you'd like that conversation translated, huh?

Me: What are you doing?
Sis: Not too much, just chillin', how 'bout you?
Me: Same stuff, different day.
Sis: I hear you. What's up?
Me: In my opinion, we need to catch up with the acronyms.
Sis: Why? I hate acronyms.
Me: I see what you mean. This is so lame. You know what? Someday soon, everything will be acronyms.
Sis: You've got to be kidding.
Me: Screwing up face in disgust.
Sis: Oh, you shut up.
Me: I will kick your ass if you say that again.
Sis: Rolling on the floor, laughing my ass off.
Me: Eat poop and die.

As much as I've made this texting book comical in today's post, I do think it's worth the $5 for parents with teenagers to spend. There are codes, like 9 (Parent is watching), 99 (Parent is no longer watching), P911, PA & PAL (Parent alerts & Parents are listening), that if you happen to see, should let you know that they are texting about stuff they don't want you to know about.

All in all, my $5 purchase today was well worth it. Will it change my mind on texting acronyms? Nope, not a chance. I have the ability to use words, so I use them. Plus, there's nothing worse than getting a text and wondering what in the hell the person just said to you.

Except for PNATMBC. I might use that one just because it makes me PMSL. 
(Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain, and Piss myself laughing.)

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1 comment:

  1. bit weird i already knew all of the tt(text talk) lol..........ipmsl