Monday, January 2, 2012

The Aftermath of Hurricane Hubby

The hubby was able to travel 2000 miles and come home for Christmas- amazing 2 weeks, then he was gone once again. No idea when we'll see him again (not in a deadbeat husband or CIA spy type of thing- he's stationed in Arizona, the kids and I are currently living in Virginia, and until we figure out how to merge the two together, it will be like that indefinitely), but we have plenty of plans in the making. Meanwhile, I'm slowing cleaning up after what I like to call:

Hurricane Hubby
~Category 5 Hurricane
~Hit landfall on December 15th and exited the area on December 29th
~Estimated cleanup date: Can not be determined until further analysis of entire affected area is done

Having hubby here was amazing, don't get me wrong. The kids and I were on cloud nine, as I know he was, too. Laughing, cuddling, talking, playing games together, just enjoying each other's company again after so long. But anyone who has had to deal with having a parent or loved one away for a while, you know everything that happens when that person finally comes home, even if just for a visit. Bedtimes get thrown out the window, the word 'no' is never even uttered, and the sadness that is left when they leave takes some getting over, too. After not even a week of 'clean up', here's where the path of Hurricane Hubby has affected things thus far:

  • The Spoiled Factor. When a dad hasn't seen his kids in 10 months, the word 'no' doesn't exist. You want candy at 10 o'clock at night? Sure, why not? Out grocery shopping at the local superstore and you want a new toy? Well, it is a few days until Christmas, but hell, go ahead. Now that Hurricane Hubby has run it's course, the kids don't understand why Mommy won't let them have ice cream right before bed, or why Mommy is making them go to bed before 11 o'clock in the first place. 
  • The Spoiled Factor... For Me. I got used to having hubby around for 2 weeks. Someone to go to the grocery store with, to run to the superstore with at 10 o'clock at night (while my sister was home with the kids), to cuddle with on the couch, to sleep next to. With him now gone, I'm having to grocery shop alone (which I admit to calling him while I'm doing it so it's like he's there with me), sleep alone (and it takes me forever to fall asleep), and am always on my phone with him telling him about the little things that happen here, or hearing about his day, because he's not here when I get home from work. It sucks.
  • The Ass Factor. I'm one of those people that eats when they are happy. Having hubby home, and deciding to put our family back together, coupled with the holiday season, added 10 pounds to my ass in 2 weeks. My work clothes don't fit anymore, and I get a frownie face whenever I look down and see what the happiness did to my petite figure. I've managed to shed 4 pounds of it in the last 4 days just by going back to my normal eating habits, but still have a little ways to go- the hard little ways. Anyone who has ever tried to lose weight knows the last 5 pounds are the hardest. 
  • The What the Hell Now Factor. We decided after almost 4 years of being separated to put our family, our life back together. Amazing, right? Yeah, the problem now is the 2000 miles in between us. While hubby was here, we thought about when the time would come that he'd be gone, and we talked about it a little, but now that the time has come and gone, we're left wondering how the hell we are going to do this and when. We don't want to take the kids out of another school in the middle of the year (that would make 3 this school year alone), but with tax refund money coming up, now would be the best time to do it. But there's school, family and the logistics of moving 2000 miles all in play. Not to mention, my hours here at work have been cut, so with no income, using the tax money for moving is the most logical answer for me, because if I live off of the tax money, I won't have it to help with the move later. Talk about a sticky situation.
  • The Idiot Factor. The What the Hell Now Factor leads directly into The Idiot Factor. A year ago at this time, the kids and I were in Arizona with hubby, making plans to move back to South Carolina. Now we're trying to figure out how to get back to Arizona. Yeah, we're idiots. Hubby and I could have just gotten our heads out of our asses last year, and the kids and I would still be in Arizona. Granted, everything happens for a reason, and there are lessons, very important lessons, that hubby and I both had to learn over the last year to even be able to make the decision to put our family back together, so I know why we had to head in the directions we did for the last year. Doesn't take away the Idiot Factor, though, and also adds a Slap Yourself in the Face Factor that sucks as well.
The aftermath of Hurricane Hubby hasn't yielded all suck ass things, though. Sometimes it takes destruction for beautiful things to be built:
  • The Happy Suzy Homemaker Factor. I've been back at it, Inklingers. Cooking meals and lunches, cleaning on a regular basis. I have a new outlook on life, which includes taking pride in my home, my kids, being thankful for what I have, and striving to be the best that I can be, and wanting to blog again on a regular basis to share all of my crazy antics with the world. 
  • The Calm Factor. Have you ever made a decision in your life that you just know was the right decision? Not only do you know it, but you feel it? You start to hear birds singing, realize you are looking at the world with love in your eyes, and find yourself sighing, not because you are stressed, but because happiness has finally set in and everything is right? That's where I'm at right now. Everything has fallen into place with this decision so far, and I have faith that everything will continue to fall into place because it's what's right for me, for hubby, for our kids, for us as a family.
  • The Boob Factor. It's the positive side of the Ass Factor. With the weight gain came fuller boobs for me. Now if only I can figure out how to lose the fat without losing the boobs. That's what gets me every time.
So, Hurricane Hubby didn't leave behind a trail of pure destruction and chaos. Beautiful things have occurred from it. Beautiful things that will last a lifetime, because we finally are getting it right this time.

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