Thursday, August 25, 2011

SuperMom vs. Tatted Mom

Ahhh, blogging. I have missed you so much. I contemplated whether to just do a huge update blog, that covers the last 5 months I’ve been MIA, or to just do smaller updates that pertain to the blog topic of that day. I opted for B, honestly, to keep you all around, lol. I figure if I give you a little here and a little there, you’ll get hooked on the Inklings all over again. So, here rolls the first post-MIA blog topic, and it’s a doozie…

I’ve moved… again. Yes, that makes the 3rd time in less than a year. I’m still in SC, but I moved about 30 minutes away from where I was- go back and read previous posts; I told you all then I hated that damn town, so yeah, I got out. This move came after meeting a guy, so, we decided to jump in head first and become the Brady Bunch- me and my two kids, him and his daughter, and we took on a stray 17 year old (okay, so not a stray, we knew him and everything beforehand, he just needed to get the hell outta his mother’s house ASAP, so we took him in). Oh yeah, and Z moved out.

A lot has happened.

So, in the last year of my life I’ve gone from a full time tattoo artist/part time mom (as horrible as that sounds, it’s the truth), to a stay at home mom, to a working single mom, now to a working mom in a family of 6…

No, I haven’t drank my V8 in a while, so that must explain why I keep smacking myself in the forehead, right???

Throughout all of this, though, there seems to be one thing that has remained the same- my desire to be SuperMom.

You are familiar with SuperMom, right? She’s that woman who gets the kids up and to school in the morning, works during the day, comes home and cooks a 7 course meal, bakes cookies, checks the kids’ homework behind them to make sure it’s right, does laundry for the next day, packs lunches and puts them in the fridge, has cleaned the house, gets the kids ready for bed, reads bedtime stories, sits down and still has time to blog, watch TV and whatever else she wants before getting 7-9 ample hours of sleep so she can do it all again the next day, all with no help from anyone.
 Okay, stop your laughing. I can hear it…

Yes, this is what I have always strived to be, no matter if I was a stay at home mom, working single mom, or mother of a family of 6 like I am now. It was much easier to be SuperMom when I was a stay at home mom. Now? Yeah, it’s not so easy. But it doesn’t mean I don’t try.

Do I kill myself in the process? Uh, yeah, isn’t that what a SuperMom is supposed to do? Sacrifice herself for the family and kids? Walk around like a zombie during the day because I’m getting up too damn early or staying up too damn late to have some adult time after the kids go to bed? Not pack a full lunch for myself so the kids can have food in their lunches? Not buy that book that I really want or that movie that would be awesome to see so that we can have money for our insert-bill-name-here payment that month? Or do I just need a wakeup call?

Maybe I’m missing the key to being a SuperMom. That’s it. That HAS to be it, because as much as I try, I feel I haven’t quite gotten to SuperMom status. So, there must be like a secret key or initiation ritual that I wasn’t given or a part of. It certainly can’t be because my definition of a SuperMom is so out of whack that’s it’s near impossible, or IS impossible to reach. That isn’t it at all…

Hmmm. Tell you what. Let’s break this down:

SuperMom: Gets up in the morning as soon as the alarm goes off, bright eyed and bushy tailed, showers, gets dressed, gets her man on his way to work, gets the kids up, packs lunches, drives them to school, then heads to work.

Tatted Mom: Has 2 alarms set on opposite sides of the room. I hit snooze on mine 3 times before getting up, Charlie hits snooze about 5 times on his, we zombie walk to the kitchen where we programmed the coffee pot the night before, throw his lunch together, get him out the door, then get the kids up, pack their lunches while they get themselves dressed and get cereal, (we have two 9 year olds and a 6 year old, they can do things themselves, in my opinion), drive them to school, come home, jump back in bed for 30 minutes, then quickly shower, get dressed, and run out the door cause I’m gonna be late for work, grabbing whatever leftovers are in the fridge as my lunch.

SuperMom: Listens to a book on CD for her 45 minute (one way) commute to work, and spends 8 glorious hours at a job she loves, or even if she is having a bad day, keeps a smile on her face cause she thinks about how she’s providing for her family. Listens to the book on CD for her 45 minute (one way) commute back home to her family that evening.

Tatted Mom: Either talks on the phone (yes, with an earbud, so don’t freak out so much) or listens to the morning radio show on the 45 minute (one way) commute to work, doing a balancing act of watching my speed so I don’t get a ticket but can still get to work on time, spends anywhere from 4-9 hours banging my head against the wall because the managerial aspect of work has become shit, wondering if today is the day I just say f*ck it and walk out the door, then eats 2-3 pixie sticks on the way home, while chain smoking to keep myself awake, blaring music and keeping the windows rolled down during my 45 minute (one way) commute home.

SuperMom: Greets her children with hugs and kisses, checks their homework to make sure it was done correctly, dresses into something more comfortable, then heads to the kitchen to begin preparing the immaculate feast of roast chicken, homemade garlic mashed potatoes, green beans, salad, fresh baked bread and from scratch carrot cake for dessert.

Tatted Mom: Gets ‘Hey mom’ as I walk in the door, ask the kids if they have even done their homework. If the reply is yes, I’m to the bedroom where I fall into bed for about 30 minutes until Charlie gets home. If the reply to the homework question is no, I simply tell them to do it, then head to the bedroom and fall into bed for 30 minutes. If I’ve worked a long shift at work, dinner is usually tacos or spaghetti, which may or may not have been prepared by the 17 year old. If I’ve worked a short shift at work, then yes, the family gets baked chicken thighs with instant garlic mashed potatoes, green beans, some can biscuits, no salad cause we have green beans, and box cake mix cookies after dinner if we’re still hungry.

SuperMom: Finishes dinner, does the dishes, gets the kids showered and into bed after having some quality family time playing a board game or watching a movie, reads bedtime stories, signs off on paperwork sent home from school, then retreats to the living room where the adults can now watch a movie, finishes the movie, straightens the house on the way to bed, where it is only 10pm at this point and she goes right to sleep so she can wake up early and start all over again.

Tatted Mom: Finishes dinner, tells the 17 year old 14 times to do the damn dishes, has to tell the kids twice each to take a shower, get maybe 30 minutes of Wii Sports played as a family (we like doing bowling tournaments), then usher the kids off to bed, collapse on the couch, put in a movie but fall asleep 30 minutes into it, get woken up and taken to bed around midnight, where I pass out pretty much immediately and get maybe 5-6 hours of sleep before those 2 alarms start going off again.

A far cry from SuperMom, that’s for sure. Are my kids starving for food or attention? Nope, not at all. Is there a roof over their head? Yep, sure is. Is there gas in my car to get to work? Most days, yeah. Am I spending more time with the family then I was as a tattoo artist/part time mom? Yep, a lot more.

So, I guess I should be thankful. I may not be SuperMom (yet), but I’m doing what I can with what I have, and making the best of it, and for right now it’s working. My kids are happy, I’m happy, everyone in the family is better than they ever have been before (so I’m told). So, for now I’m content…

But will work on petitioning the earth for an extra hour or two a day so I can maybe reach SuperMom status by Christmas. Extra daily hours would do it, I just know it…..

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  1. I dunno, you sound like super mom from where I'm sitting.

    Glad you're back. You've been missed.

  2. I know how you feel so much!!! I have two kids, run a daycare during the day starting at 6am AND then we had a teenager living with us; who we know cause she is our best friends little sister... whom she became abusive towards. Now things have calmed down, the teen is on her own in independent living but the daycare is still going strong and trying my patience.

    congrats on your amazing life changes and good luck, so happy to see you back.

    also i figure if my house isn't burnt down at the end of the day and i'm not pulling a "marg" in the corner of the room, i've done good.